My story

My Story

kerri

"God could not be everywhere, and so He made mothers". -- Jewish Proverb

During my pregnancy I dreamt that I had had a premature baby. I was as you might say naive at the time and didn't know anything about premature babies and had never known anyone have a premature baby. I dreamt that the baby was so small that it had to be given doll's clothes to wear. After the dream I prepared for the birth by getting everything that was needed (5 months before the baby was due).

When I was 32 weeks pregnant I felt some pain in my stomach and it actually felt as if the baby was falling out. I explained my concerns to a midwife during a routine checkup but she said that everything was okay. Four days later (Saturday) I awoke and discovered a slight bleed. I telephoned the hospital and was told to go the Maternity Department in Prince Charles Hospital, Merthyr Tydfil immediately. I felt frightened because I felt that I was going to lose the baby.

I told my husband Peter what was happening and packed a bag to go to the hospital. I did not take anything for the baby because I was too afraid of what might happen. Although the hospital is only 20 minutes away it seemed like a long journey.

On my arrival at the hospital I was examined and given an injection almost immediately to help the baby's lungs to develop. I was told that the intention was to give medication to help stop the labour to give the baby a chance to go full-term in the womb.

I was taken to a ward. During the remainder of the night and the following morning the pain in my stomach got worse and more regular. That evening I felt that the mucus plug had come out and informed the nurses. I had a scan and was told that the baby was now lying across my stomach which would obviously cause complications if it did not turn.

The following morning, another scan and the baby was now breach. It had turned during the night, but everything else was okay. The following two days were spent trying to keep the baby in my womb by giving medication. But, as the dose of the medication was increased the contractions lessened, but I began to have heart palpitations.

On Tuesday evening my husband, who was now staying in the hospital with me, and I were becoming increasingly concerned. Every time the drug to control my contractions was increased the palpitations would also increase. We started to ask questions about what was happening and what would happen if they could not control the labour. We were told that I would have a caesarian section and there was no need to worry because they would have plenty of time to carry out the operation. We were told that the baby would go to the Special Care Baby Unit at the hospital. We were shown a photo album of the Unit to prepare us for seeing the machines and monitors.

That night my husband ended up sleeping on a 'birthing bean-bag' on the floor. Within half an hour my waters broke and I called for my husband to get a midwife. Midwives and doctors arrived and I was told not to worry because the baby could be kept in the womb despite losing the fluid. Suddenly I felt some pressure and told the midwives that I could feel something coming out. They looked and could see the umbilical cord. Immediately there was panic. I was given gas and air and while they rushed around preparing. I was given consent forms to fill in. Immediately I was put on a hospital trolley and rushed to theatre with a nurse on the trolley holding the cord back in. My last memory is of the doctor holding a scalpel over me waiting for the anaesthetic to work. (I have since been told that I was 7cm dilated which was enough for Katie to be born because she was so small).

I woke up in the morning (8th April, 1998) to be told by my husband that we had a "beautiful baby girl". I was given a photograph to hold of my daughter - Katie Rebecca Thomas. She weighed 4 lbs 1 1/2 oz. Shortly afterwards the paediatric consultant arrived to tell me that the baby was in the Special Care Baby Unit and that she was having some help to breathe but apart from that she was healthy. (I have since been told that she was born breech but diagonal and that there was a problem with the placenta being stuck).

After some preparation I was taken to the Special Care Baby Unit on the hospital bed. Katie was in the intensive care unit. She was in an incubator with tubes everywhere and connected to numerous machines. I watched carefully as the breathing monitor showed how Katie was breathing on her own and how the machine was breathing for her. I was able to hold her hand through the holes in the incubator.

On the Friday (Day 3) I was moved from a single ward to the main ward. There were several mothers and newborn babies on the ward. I found this quite distressing knowing I was separated from Katie. I asked to be wheeled in to see her as often as I could. Day 3 was the first time for me to hold my baby and it is difficult to put into words what I felt at that time. How can anyone prepare you for that?

My husband Peter, was the first to change Katie's nappy as I could not stand up to reach her. I was discharged on the Sunday but then reality hit me. I had to go home without my baby. For seven months I had carried her and then had to leave her in hospital and go home without her. When I left the hospital I decided to go shopping to the local supermarket (4 days after having a caesarian section). Not suprisingly I felt ill and started to have palpitations again and had to be taken back to casualty. Everything turned out to be okay but it was very difficult to rest at that time.

Katie stayed in hospital for a month. I stayed with her during the days but was encouraged to go home to rest at night. I was expressing milk regularly using a machine provided by the hospital and it was given to her mixed with some special prem baby milk, via a tube through her nose. She was given a dummy to encourage her under developed sucking reflex.

Towards the end of the month my husband and I were able to stay in the flat attached to the unit and get used to looking after her on our own. After countless attempts and some varied advice on breastfeeding I breastfed Katie for the first 2 months and bottle fed her after that. She left the hospital one month after her birth.

I have to say that we received tremendous help and support from the staff at the SCBU unit at the hospital at all times during Katie's stay and afterwards.

The whole series of events shook me up pretty badly, though. The build up, the emergency section and the premature birth all contributed to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - rather more severe than post natal depression, which is severe enough in its own right. The first few months after she was born were particularly difficult. Katie never seemed to stop crying and the nights became a nightmare. She slept very little and when she did sleep I would be panicking that something would happen. I was always worried that something might happen to her.

Fortunately for us all those difficult times passed and Katie, by the age of two, displayed no ill effects of being born two months early. She is of normal height, weight and is as bright and mischievous as any toddler.

Today, I am working full-time as an ICT teacher in a Secondary School and studying part-time on a MSc Technology for Teaching and Learning course. I consider myself fully recovered from the experience and feel happy about having another baby when I feel that the time is ready.

My advice to other mothers in the same situation is:

Persevere with breastfeeding

Expressing milk makes you feel better knowing that you are doing something to help your baby
Look after yourself - eat properly and get as much rest as possible
Don't be afraid to ask for help from organisations, friends, family and your health visitor
Join or start a support group if possible.

In November 2001 I had a car accident whilst on my way to work. I was taken to hospital on a spine board. Just before the doctors were about to X-Ray me I told them that I might be pregnant and it was confirmed. I was five weeks pregnant.

On Christmas Eve I started to bleed and eventually went for a scan. I was told that I have a subseptate uterus which means that it is heart-shaped. I was surprised because I was told that it was genetic so I would have had it when I had Katie but didn't know. I was told that there is more chance of miscarriage and that it is likely that the baby will be born breech. I have had not any problems since. The baby is due 3rd August, 2002.

Arwyn Rhys Thomas was born 10th June, 2002 - 8 weeks early.

The story continues...

Matthew David Thomas was born 14th May, 2005 (also 8 weeks early)

We are in the NEWS - Mum's Mission to aid babies

Call for premature baby lifesaver - article on BBC News 24 featuring Katie and Arwyn